My back straightens and my teeth clinch every time I hear it.
“Adoption sounds great, but I just don’t know if I could love someone’s else child like they were one of my own.”
For the most part, I know the person isn’t meaning to offend. And yet, they do.
You see, my boys are my own. And don’t try to tell me any differently.
I didn’t carry them in my womb for 9 months.
But we agonized for 9 months, with paperwork, government approvals, background checks, fingerprints, and lots of waiting. (Yes, both of our adoptions took about 9 months to complete!)
I didn’t gain weight during those 9 months.
Actually, I think I did. Stress eating will do that to you!
They don’t look like us.
Okay, again, they kind of do. We get comments all the time. ‘Wow, your older son looks just like his Daddy!’ And our younger son has mommy’s brown hair & eyes… and will likely also have my short stature!
And so what if we don’t look alike? Is that really what matters? Our genes don’t match. But our hearts do. I’d much rather share passions and heart than genetic makeup. Family isn’t about biology. It’s about connections, support, discipline, encouragement, and love.
Have you ever had someone totally dependent on you for their needs?
Have you ever spent sleepless nights worrying that you might have missed something on those piles of paperwork you just sent to the government?
Have you ever gone half way around the world to find a missing piece of your family?
Have you ever been unable to sleep, because you can’t take your eyes off the precious creation sleeping peacefully beside you?
Have you ever fought for someone’s well-being and rights, not caring about the opinions of others?
Have you ever had a little one look deep in your eyes and tell you how much they love you? And you knew they really meant it?
I love our boys with a passion that runs deep. I would do anything to keep them from harm. I fervently pursue the best for them. I strive to protect them from sickness, from injury, from bullies, from the evils of this world. I challenge them. I encourage them. I advocate for them.
They are our children, each a precious gift from God. God chose us to be a family.
We didn’t become family in what most consider to be the traditional way, but that doesn’t make us any less a family.
I am thankful that their birth mothers chose life for them. And I am thankful that God saw fit for us to be their forever family. They are OUR OWN.
“Not flesh of my flesh
Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn’t grow under my heart,
But in it.”
~ Author Unknown
~ Special thanks to other adoptive mommies for inspiring me to share my heart on this subject ~
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